E. Amdur – R. Hubal: The Accord Agent
Managing Intense, Problematic Social Interactions Within Business
Environments
Professional Series N.2
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No matter your line of work, you are pretty much assured of encountering someone who is difficult to deal with—an angry customer, a disgruntled employee, a know-it-all consultant, or simply someone off the street who is mentally ill, intoxicated, or otherwise unstable. You will find yourself in situations engaging with someone who is emotional or confused or has an agenda that clearly conflicts with yours or that of your business. In these situations, can you prepare for the possibility of the interaction heading the wrong way, while still maintain a calm demeanor and a focus on shared goals and a successful outcome? What common skills do these scenarios—and many others like them—require?
In The Accord Agent, Ellis Amdur and Robert Hubal share their decades of experience working with business and social service agencies in training and developing social interaction skills, particularly in ‘intense, problematic’ situations with individuals who may view themselves as adversarial. The Accord Agent is someone who continually tries to reach accord with the other person, striving to establish rapport, manage crises, and de-escalate aggression.
The Accord Agent maintains a focus on his or her goals, while simultaneously seeking to achieve a level of trust, engaging others with professionalism, integrity, and respect. The Accord Agent crafts the communication to form a working relationship with the other person to share in achieving the aims of his
or her professional responsibilities.
I first encountered Ellis Amdur through his writings; as a rookie defense attorney, I relied on Ellis’s books on conflict de-escalation to give me a framework for dealing with my most challenging clients. Now, in
collaboration with Robert Hubal, Ellis’s newest work takes conflict resolution training material original designed for law enforcement and military, and adapts it for civilian use. This book is an essential work for any person whose professional life requires them to take an active role in achieving accord between adversarial groups: the social worker working with conflicting parties to achieve the best outcome for an endangered child, the manager integrating rival teams, or the attorney trying to achieve compromise in business negotiation. Rather than
becoming drawn into the conflict or being dominated by the emotions of the parties, the ‘accord agent’ develops the strength and integrity to walk the centerline of conflict, listening to and respecting all sides without losing focus on the ultimate goal of resolution, becoming the eye of the storm around which order is restored.
– David Sims, Attorney at Law
Product Details
ASIN: B0FCS9QKWF
Publisher:The Ran Network
Publication date: June 10, 2025
Language: English
Print length: 254 pages
ISBN-13: 979-8287559816
Item Weight: 567 gr
Dimensions: 17.78 x 1.47 x 25.4 cm
Part of series : Professional Series (N.2)
Table of Contents
SECTION I: Introduction to the Accord Agent
CHAPTER 1: The Accord Agent
CHAPTER 2: Essential Accord Agent Skills
SECTION II: Composure: Standing with Strength in Crisis Situations
CHAPTER 3: Coordination of Self
Adopting the Right Attitude
CHAPTER 4: Driving on Black Ice: Stillness in Motion
CHAPTER 5: It’s Not Personal Unless You Make It So
CHAPTER 6: No One Will Own Me
CHAPTER 7: Tactical Breathing—Be the Eye in the Center
of the Hurricane
Circular Breathing Method #1—Front to Back
Circular Breathing Method #2—Back to Front
How You Should Practice Circular Breathing
When Should You Use Circular Breathing
CHAPTER 8: Alternative Breathing Methods: Numbered Breathing & Matching Breaths
Numbered Breathing
Matching Breaths
CHAPTER 9: The Intoxication and Joy of Righteous Anger
Protecting Your Family and Team from What You Otherwise Would Bring Home
SECTION III: Beyond the Basics: Core Elements Necessary to Manage Intense and Problematic Situations
CHAPTER 10: Core Elements
CHAPTER 11: Dynamic Relaxation—Your Physical and Attitudinal Stance
CHAPTER 12: Correct Distance
CHAPTER 13: Eye Contact
CHAPTER 14: Interweaving
Bracketing
Scanning
Entry
Regulating
CHAPTER 15: A Few Angles on Bias
My Way Is the Only Way (aka Egocentricity Bias)
Attribution Bias
Confirmation Bias
CHAPTER 16: Working With, Not Against Pattern Biases
CHAPTER 17: Positive Cognitive Dissonance (Undermining the Other’s Biases Towards the Accord Agent)
CHAPTER 18 : The ‘Balancing Powers’—Fire & Water
Fire
Water
SECTION IV: What to Say and How to Say It
CHAPTER 19: A Strategic Approach to Accord Agent Skills
Flow of Dialog
CHAPTER 20: Tactical Paraphrasing: A Core Communication Strategy to Master from the Beginning
How to Master Tactical Paraphrasing
CHAPTER 21: Incorporating the Lessons Learned from the Discipline of Crisis Intervention
Crisis Intervention Principles Applied to Cultural Issues
Crisis Stages
CHAPTER 22 : Pros and Cons of Different Forms of Response
CHAPTER 23 : Ten Quick Tips to Help Establish Accord in Potentially Hostile Situations
Focus on the Future
Avoid Absolutes
Stance
Time Management
Personalize and Provide Direction
Open Response, Observe
Invest
No Assumption, No Speculation
Terminology, Just Talk
Success
SECTION V: Training Yourself to Be an Accord Agent
CHAPTER 24 : Embodying Accord Agent Skills…………………………. 119
CHAPTER 25 : Becoming an Accord Agent………………………………… 121
CHAPTER 26 : Self-Bias: The Ultimate Impediment……………………. 125
SECTION VI : Responding to Things Going Sideways……………………… 133
CHAPTER 27 : Be at Your Best by Preparing for the Worst…………… 135
CHAPTER 28 : The Predator…………………………………………………….. 137
CHAPTER 29 : Honor and Shame……………………………………………… 143
CHAPTER 30 : Feeling/Emotional Based—No Internal Compass….. 149
CHAPTER 31 : The Unethical Person—Pure Self-Interest……………. 153
CHAPTER 32 : The Eccentric/Mentally Disordered Person………….. 157
SECTION VII: Accord Agent Scenarios…………………………………………. 163
CHAPTER 33 : Scenarios for Business……………………………………….. 165
I Need My Service Animal………………………………………………….. 174
Anxiety……………………………………………………………………………. 190
The Paranoid Employee……………………………………………………… 195
Adversarial Business Negotiation………………………………………… 203
Doing Business with a Local Power-Broker…………………………… 207
Honor & Shame………………………………………………………………… 214
Guilt………………………………………………………………………………… 221
SECTION VIII: Putting It All Together………………………………………….. 227
CHAPTER 34 : A Review…………………………………………………………. 229
Initiation………………………………………………………………………….. 229
Nonverbal Communication………………………………………………… 229
Sensemaking…………………………………………………………………….. 229
Recognizing Social Affordances…………………………………………… 230
Perspective Tracking………………………………………………………….. 230
Building Rapport……………………………………………………………….. 230
Decisive Action…………………………………………………………………. 230
Repair………………………………………………………………………………. 231
Successful Outcomes…………………………………………………………. 231
Respect, Goal Direction, and Trust………………………………………. 232
CHAPTER 35 : Final Word………………………………………………………. 233
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